


Muse

by Monsoon



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Artsy!Levi, Ereri Secret Santa, Fluff, Levi crushing on Eren, M/M, awkward embarrassing confessions, bless these fools
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-25
Updated: 2014-12-25
Packaged: 2018-03-03 11:18:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,727
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2849009
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsoon/pseuds/Monsoon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi has a crush. Apparently, sitting for hours by the college oval every Thursday long after all his classes have ended to sketch the same boy over and over again goes a little beyond simply artistic pursuits...</p>
            </blockquote>





	Muse

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> For Ereri Secret Santa 2014!  
> Sorry this was late! I’m currently living in a Vietnamese hostel with unreliable wifi and a hectic schedule. No excuses though, I hope you like it! Have some crushing, artsy!Levi set in a college, modern!au. Merry Christmas!! :)
> 
> God, crushing Levi is so awkward and shy. What a dork.

Levi’s pencil flew over his sketch book, light grey lines sharp but sure against stark white paper. He’d never had a very good handle of the male anatomy when it came to drawing. He always emphasized the muscle too much in vain attempt to discern the figure from being too feminine. The female body, now that was easy; all soft curves and symmetry. So much simpler, he’d never even needed a model.

He’d tried sketching off male models at first, but none of them fit the lean look he wanted to master. They were all bulk with swollen muscles and rippling abs. Too harsh and stone-cold; like statues chiselled from marble. There was no life to it.

He’d first seen the boy by chance. Levi hadn’t even been sure why he’d been on that side of campus, around the cluster of science buildings, in the first place. It was directly opposite the humanities, he must have been on another absent-minded stroll again. The boy had been playing soccer with a crew of other boys and girls on the small oval outside the main lecture. A bundle of furious energy, hurtling and dodging between players as he made for the goals on the end of the field. He scored of course, how could he have not with that single-minded determination, and he’d let out an exhilarated whoop of triumph and whipped off his navy polo, spinning it over his head as the members of his team piled on top of him victoriously. It had taken Levi a moment to process that, sometime during the game, he’d settled on a bench nearby and had pulled out his long-neglected sketchpad. He wanted to draw, for the first time in a long time, he’d found something that caught his attention and interest enough to want to memorialize it on paper. The boy intrigued him, he wanted to capture that vitality he seemed to exude even when stationary, somehow translate it onto paper the way he’d never been able to before.

That had been the first of numerous sessions to come. Every Thursday, without fail for weeks to come, Levi found himself on that same park bench sketching the boy as he played. He’d sit there for hours, long after he was finished with college for the day. He’d sit there as long as the boy stayed.

“Yooo, Levi!” _Oh God_ “Here again? You might as well switch majors!” _Please no. Just leave._

But of course they didn’t. Hanji couldn’t recognise a hint if it hit them with the force of small pick-up truck, or rather, they refused to. Levi let out a resigned sigh and set his pencil down, turning to fix Hanji with a dead glare as they approached. The Bespectacled Disaster bounded up to him, unfazed by his unwelcoming aura, and dropped themselves down beside him on the bench. They leaned close, trying to get a peek at his drawing, but Levi clutched the half-finished sketch to his chest defensively.

“What are you doing here?” He asked. Screw niceties, Hanji never expected them from him anymore and it’s not like rudeness would drive them away, Levi had several exhausting years to attest to that. The brunette fixed him with an arched look.

“ _I_ just came out of a lecture, thank you very much. What’s your excuse, Loverboy?”

“I’m not – what? Fuck off Hanji,“ Levi sighed, dragging a hand wearily down his face before realizing it was smeared with graphite. His face was probably smeared with graphite now. Fuck “I was just… waiting for my lecture to begin.”

“You’re waiting on the opposite side of campus for your lecture to begin?” Hanji scoffed “Alright, buddy.” Thankfully, they didn’t mention that he shouldn’t even have any more classes for today and ceased talking for the moment, turning to watch the soccer game being played out across from them and Levi finally deemed it safe enough to open up his sketch pad again and resume his work.

“I can see why you like to draw him.” Levi glanced up immediately, only to find that Hanji wasn’t even looking at his page but still watching the game. Had they looked while he hadn’t been paying attention? How else would they know he was drawing someone from the game, and specifically focusing on one? He wasn’t even sure why he was so hell-bent on hiding the object of his attention in the first place. Perhaps because he had been going out of his way to hunt the boy down every Thursday long after his classes had ended, only to quietly sit by the sidelines for often hours on end and draw him. It was long past the novelty stage by now, probably. He didn’t even know the kid, only knew that his name was Jaeger from what he’d heard other players call him during their games. Levi had already filled an entire book with sketches and he was half way through this one. It was sort of embarrassing and almost entirely creepy. Okay, in retrospect those were some pretty good reasons to lie about why he wound up here every Thursday.

“Draw who?” he might as well play dumb. Why not.

“Don’t bother, Levi,” Hanji smiled, eyes not leaving the field “I’ve often stood right next to you completely silent waiting to see how long it took for you to notice I was here but not once have you. Not at least while you were drawing him, and I know it’s always him because your eyes only follow him.” Suddenly, Hanji swivelled their whole body around to face him, the motion so abrupt that Levi instinctively recoiled. They planted their elbows on their crossed knees, chin placed over their clasped fingers as they watched him with gleaming, eager eyes and a shit-eating grin. Hanji could be fucking terrifying sometimes. “So, have you talked to him yet?”

What was the point in continuing to deny it now? Levi was an efficient guy and he knew a wasted effort when he saw it. He couldn’t help the surge of embarrassed defensiveness that surged through him though at Hanji’s question. “No, of course not. I don’t even know him.” He shrugged, ducking his head to squint at his half-finished drawing. He said it as though the answer was obvious; why should he, anyway? He didn’t _want_ to talk to him. He just wanted to draw him. He was nice to draw, that’s all.

Apparently his answer was the epitome of insolence, judging by the melodramatic gasp that Hanji emitted, throwing themselves back with a hand over their mouth as they regarded him through thick lenses with nothing short of abject horror. “What do you _mean_ you haven’t spoken to him? Are you telling me that for the past-” Hanji flailed as they mentally calculated “- _several weeks_ , you have been sitting here, fawning over that hot piece of ass and _not_ tried to make any moves?!”

“I haven’t been fawning over any hot pieces of ass!” Levi snapped defensively. He hadn’t realized that he’d shouted until he saw a few of the players shoot curious looks his way. Even Jaeger glanced their way at the noise and Levi felt the heat rise in his cheeks immediately as green eyes met grey. Levi glowered at Hanji who grinned back unapologetically.

“Last week,” Hanji started, squinting into the distance with an expression of intense concentration “when it hit ninety eight degrees and all the guys were playing shirtless because of the heat, I clearly recall you literally _salivating_ over Eren’s sweat-slicked hot-bod. I’m serious, I _saw_ the drop of drool that landed on your sketchbook. Yes Levi, I was there.” Oh _fuck_. Levi had remembered swiping the saliva away, red-faced, as he glanced around to see if anyone had noticed. He hadn’t thought it was possible to actually _drool_ over someone. He tried convince himself he’d been focusing on Jaeger’s movements so intensely for his work that he’d drifted off, but even _he_ didn’t believe that excuse.

“What the hell is wrong with you? How often do you sit there watching me for anyway?!”

“Not half as long as you do and apparently _I_ have the balls to actually approach you,” Hanji shot back. Wait a second. Levi replayed Hanji’s words in his mind and his eyes widened in realization.

“Eren? His names Eren? How do you know his name?” Hanji blinked and slapped a hand over their mouth.

“Whoops, did I forget to mention he’s in one of my bio-chem tutes?” They mumbled through their fingers.

“You _know_ him?!” Levi demanded, shoving his book aside to confront Hanji face-to-face. The brunette shrunk under his glare. “All this fucking time you could have introduced me?”

“Ah ha!” Hanji thrust a triumphant fist into the air. “So you admit it!”

“No!” Levi searched for an excuse, mortified by his unconscious admission “I meant as, like, an artist. You could have introduced him to me as a model, you know? Make this easier for me.” Hanji stared at him flatly before slowly shaking their head with disappointment.

“I give up,” they said, throwing their hands into the air in exasperation and standing “You can just wallow in lonely denial for all I care. I tried to stage an intervention, but you are beyond help.” Hanji snatched up their backpack and fixed Levi with an uncharacteristically stern look, levelling a single reprimanding finger at him “I hope that soccer ball hits you in the head one of these days and knocks some sense into you.” Levi watched his friend leave in stunned silence. Hanji didn’t explode like that often, was he really as bad as they made him seem?

Levi turned to watch Eren on the playing field. The game was wrapping up and Levi hadn’t even been paying enough attention to know which side had one. A lot of the players were drifting off the oval, waving goodbye with their bags slung over their shoulders and guzzling from their water bottles. Eren was still straggling behind, kicking the ball lazily between two other players, a short, bald boy and a blonde with a long side-fringe covering her right eye. How could Hanji expect him to make a move? His weird attraction didn’t even make sense, it was so superficial. It literally stemmed from finding the brunets lean physique aesthetically appealing from an artistic point of view and slowly evolved into a stupid, school-girl crush. He hadn’t even known the guys first name until a few minutes ago! What was he supposed to do, stroll up to him after a game and say ‘hey, so I’ve been stalking you for over a month watching all your games and sketching creepy half-nudes of you in secret. Wanna grab a coffee together?” Fuck, he’d get bashed for sure. Was he even _into_ guys? What were the chances of that? Levi wasn’t particularly fond of the idea of being set upon and pummelled by his crush and his soccer team. Okay, it was decided then, things would remain as they were.

He began to gather up his art supplies that were scattered around the park bench. It had already gotten quite dark, the lights around the oval had flickered on to illuminate the now practically deserted campus. Levi tried to ignore how miserable he felt about his apparent final decision. It was the rational one, so why couldn’t he accept that? Why couldn’t Hanji see that? His solitary rumination was interrupted by the sound of someone suddenly shouting “heads!” from the direction of the oval. The word didn’t process immediately, so rather than ducking at the warning, Levi turned towards the person who had shouted to see what all the fuss was about. Only to be hit square in the face with what was presumably the soccer ball.

His supplies scattered as he went down, all the loose sheets in his sketchpad flying free and his pens and pencils spilled out around him. It hurt, of course, both the blow to the face as well as the one to his backside as he landed ungracefully on the uneven pavement, but neither hurt as much as his pride. All he could think during the few milliseconds it took for his ass to make contact with the ground was “Eren saw that. He’s watching right now. He’s thinking ‘why the hell didn’t that idiot duck when he was warned to?’ God, I want to die.” Levi lay on the ground unmoving. Hanji had probably jinxed him with their parting words. The ground was filthy and that he really should get up since apparently it wasn’t about to swallow him up any time soon. Levi frowned at the sound of running footsteps approaching. No, don’t come here, please don’t offer to help. Just pretend you didn’t see anything, I’m fine!

“Holy shit, I’m so sorry! Oh my God, are you okay?!” _Eren?_ Levi opened up one eye a crack in order to confirm that yes, it was in fact the one person in the world he wished didn’t see his spectacular fail, who was crouching over him with a look of concern. Levi shut his eye and took a deep breath. It wouldn’t do to continue laying here quietly, the guy might think he was seriously injured and call an ambulance. Wouldn’t that just be the cherry on top of a great night? The sound of rustling paper was what got him moving, though. His sketches of Eren! Levi was upright immediately, snatching up the sheets of loose paper that had spilled around him, desperately shoving them haphazardly back into his sketch pad. It didn’t matter if they got crumpled, he couldn’t let Eren see those drawings!

“I’m fine, thank you,” he said, refusing to meet the boys gaze as he crawled around on all fours. There, that was everything, right? Levi glanced up at Eren’s friends who were standing by their bags now, looking their way. Fuck.

Levi took another deep breath. Just… say it’s okay and leave. That’s all that’s required, that was polite, right? He combed the messy hair from his face and turned towards where the brunet was still crouched, soccer ball under on arm. And froze. Eren was kneeling where Levi had been laying just moments ago, looking over a couple of sheets of paper in his hand. Levi’s sketches. Oh God.

“I—uh…” Levi felt his stomach knot uneasily. What was he supposed to say? Eren spoke up first, however, apparently completely unaware of Levi’s mortification.

“These are amazing,” He breathed. Levi did a double take. The brunet looked up at him, green eyes bright with admiration and looking at Levi in amazement. He turned to sketches so Levi could see them too, and he couldn’t help but feel a little dismayed when he recognized them as the topless ones from last week. They were rough, but the model was clearly recognizable. Eren stood shirtless, one hand sweeping back sweaty hair and the other clutching a crumpled towel. Then Eren’s reaction struck him and Levi looked back at the boy, confused. “This is me, right?” Eren asked, his small smile growing as he returned to admiring the drawings, drinking up every detail with fevered veneration.

“Y-yeah…” Levi shifted closer to seemingly look at the drawings as well, although really he was trying to get a closer look at Eren. He honestly couldn’t see any signs of anger on the boy, he didn’t even looked creeped out.

“Wow,” Eren handed the drawings back to Levi and he could help but notice that the action seemed reluctant. Then the boy caught sight of the rest of Levi’s drawings clutched closely to his chest. “You have more? Can I see?” Levi couldn’t help instinctively holding the pages closer to himself and Eren bit his lip, catching the action. “Sorry, I don’t mean to pry. I get that it’s private” He said, laughing awkwardly and scratching the back of his neck. You wouldn’t think that if you knew they were all of you. “You’re just really good. I’d seen you hanging around here often and thought you were just studying, not drawing.”

“You’re not angry?” Levi asked, surprised. Eren looked more shocked by the question than Levi felt at Eren’s reaction.

“Why would I be? I’m sort of flattered to be honest.” Oh god. He was being bashful and Levi wanted to draw it; the shy curve of his lips, the self-conscious way his eyes looked down and side-ways, long, dark eyelashes brushing his pink-tinged cheeks. He even had dimples. Levi thought the words ‘heart skipping a beat’ were just a figure of speech, but Lord did he understand the feeling now. He realized he was staring when Eren chewed his bottom lip, looking embarrassed by Levi’s scrutiny. “So… Do you do this often? Just go people watching?”

“No, just you.” Oh shit. “Uh, no, I mean–” Goddamnit, Levi “–I like to draw you.” Way to go, dickhead. If he didn’t think you were a creep before, he sure as hell thinks it now. Levi groaned and covered his eyes with his free hand. “I’m sorry, that must sound so weird. I swear I’m not a stalker.” Levi looked up at the sound of Eren’s laughter and found himself momentarily awestruck by the sight. The way his green eyes crinkled up around the edges and his dimples grew more pronounced. He was fucking adorable. He was also laughing at him. Sure, no one wanted to be laughed at, but Levi would gladly take it since it was far better than the punch he’d been expecting. Eren finally composed himself and looked at Levi, eyes still shining with mirth.

“You’re cute.” Levi felt his heart leap into his throat. He continued to stare at Eren in disbelief; had he really just said that? Sure, Levi had seen his lips move and heard his voice say the words but _had he really just said that?!_

“Like… a no-homo sort of cute?” what the fuck was he even saying? Why look a gift horse in the mouth, why open that can of worms? He should just take the small blessing; it was far more than he’d ever expected. Those two words were enough fuel to last at least another two weeks. Eren frowned slightly but laughed it off, looking a little uncomfortable

“Haha not really?” He looked down, almost apologetically “Sorry if that makes you uncomfortable. I’d noticed you since a while back but didn’t really know how to approach and just thought I’d take advantage of the situation.” His threw up the soccer ball and caught it again, all the while avoiding looking directly at Levi.

“Take advantage of hitting me in the face with a soccer ball as segue into hitting on me?” Putting it so bluntly made Eren blush.

“Okay that sounds so bad, I’m so sorry for hitting you it was totally an accident!” He took a deep breath “Man what am I even doing? This wasn’t smooth at all, I’m sorry. Pretend this never happened, I don’t even know if you’re into dudes.” So his suspicions were correct.

“So you _are_ hitting on me?” He had to confirm, just in case. He could be wrong? Eren stared at him.

“Yeah, I am.”

“Right. Wow.” I want to kiss you. Was that too direct? Eren seemed to be a direct sort of person. Wait, Levi hadn’t even given him any reason to believe he reciprocated. In fact, Eren was looking increasingly uneasy, probably assuming his blunt confession had creeped Levi out. No, that wasn’t creepy at all, _Levi_ was the creepy one.

“I should go…” Eren made to stand up and Levi blurted the first words that came to mind, desperate to keep the other from misunderstanding.

“I’ll go with you!” Eren looked at him in confusion.

“Out with you, I mean,” Levi amended.

“What?”

“I mean that I’d like to. Go out with you. I’m also interested.” The two stared at each other, processing the exchange. Levi wanted to punch himself, he was usually so smooth and collected and now he was tripping over his own words.

“You… wow wait, okay,” Slowly, Eren’s mouth stretched into a wide smile. It was like the sun coming out from behind a storm cloud. Had Levi really just thought that? Fuck. He was so fucked. “Oh…okay!” Eren nodded and grinned, hastily holding out a hand to help Levi to his feet. Levi took it, hyper-aware of the warmth and the rough, callused grip against his softer, graphite stained one. He pulled out one of his sketches and, awkwardly leaning against his sketchpad, scribbled down his number on one corner before handing it to the other boy. This was so messy, awkward and embarrassing. It was like high school confessions all over again except that Levi had never done this sort of thing even in high school. It was like he was slowly devolving into a hormonal mess. Levi didn’t like not having complete control of the situation.

Eren stared at the sheet in his hand for a while, it was hard to tell if he was looking at the number scribbled on or the sketch of himself. He finally looked up and Levi felt his heartbeat speed up immediately.

“I’ll call you then.”

“Mhm, sure.” A nod, a tentative smile and a small, shy wave. Eren turned away and jogged back over to his friends were waiting, murmuring between themselves as they watched the scene unfold. Levi watched him grab his things and head off, his friends thumping him on the back and ruffling his hair as they undoubtedly teased and congratulated him. He turned back once more before he left to wave at Levi who returned the gesture with a small smile. Maybe he’d be okay with not having complete control of this situation? He liked where this was heading and it all happened because his ‘plan’ had gone wrong. Maybe it would be better to just let things flow naturally for once.

Levi pulled out his phone as he turned to leave, the night air cool and refreshing after the blistering heat of the day. He dialled Hanji’s number and waited for the call to go through, his absent-minded smile already beginning to stretch into a full blown grin. This called for a movie night.  
  



End file.
